Planning A Hen Party for the Reluctant Bride

Planning A Hen Party for the Reluctant Bride

So, your best friend has announced she’s engaged, and asked you to be her maid of honour. You accept without hesitation, and start babbling about how excited you are to plan the hen party, does she want to go away, or does she fancy a lovely cosy cottage weekend, or maybe you could do a pub crawl, and then she interrupts you.

“I don’t think I want a hen party actually.”


First things first - what is she imagining when you say hen party? For a lot of people, the phrase conjures up images of phallic headwear, strippers and daring strange men to drink shots from the bride’s cleavage - and that’s not their idea of a good time at all.

Reassure Her

If this is her sticking point, reassure her that hen parties do not have to be like this AT ALL anymore! Even brides who opt for a more traditional night out style hen party are rejecting the tat that’s so often associated with such nights out - there’s some gorgeously subtle and classy hen party accessories out there, from gorgeous luxe satin sashes, to elegant enamel pins she’ll be proud to wear again and again that are bound to be right up her street.

Spoil Her

Maybe, even with the promise of a sophisticated night out, she’s still adamant she doesn’t want a hen party. Time to think outside the box! Would she love a weekend away with her nearest and dearest, where all that is on the agenda is sampling ever flavour of Ben and Jerry’s, and watching all the trashy romantic comedies that she’d never admit to enjoying? Or maybe a city break with a handful of close friends is what she’s after - steer clear of the well known party cities, and enjoy a more cultured weekend of art galleries and museums, and come away with memories you’ll actually be able to remember.

Suggest a Bridal Shower

If a night out is not what she wants, and a weekend away is too full on for her, how about an afternoon hen party? There are some amazing classes that will help you while away an afternoon, and who knows, you might even come away with a new hobby! From dance lessons to crafts, you’re sure to find something she’s interested in, and afternoons like this can be really inclusive, allowing her to invite family as well as friends, without the fear of Aunty Jean having to decline a lap dance from an amorous male stripper…

Involve Her

If she agrees to let you throw her a hen party, allow your bride to be as involved as she wants to be - and for the love of all that is glittery, do not spring any surprises on her! If she’s trusting you to throw her a party she’ll enjoy, and she’s expressed concerns - listen to them. It’s meant to be a fun event for her and the last thing you want is for the hen party to be the main topic of conversation at the wedding because it was such a disaster! And if she’s really expressed a wish not to have one - do not spring a surprise party on her!

Working with your friend will allow you to plan a hen party that’s perfect for the person it’s meant to be for - and whilst her ideal party might be different to yours, the main thing is that she enjoys it.

And you can always leave strict instructions with her as to how you want yours to go when the time comes - drinking games and all!